Solar

The NY Post's Kyle Smith reports that McEwan's novel "Solar" (Random House), a satirical global-warming thriller, is about a philandering physicist named Michael Beard whose wife deserts him after she discovers he's had 11 affairs. He accepts a boat trip to the Arctic to "see global warming for himself" and flies to Norway, where he boards a snowmobile-like Ski-Doo for a journey to the ship. In a rush because of an impending snowstorm, he neglects to relieve himself before leaving the hotel. Later, in so much agony he fears his bladder will burst, he stops outdoors in a gale to do his business, and his penis freezes solid against his zipper. By the time Beard frees himself and puts "it away, his unfortunate [member] was as hard as ice . . . He let himself be guided back to [his guide's] Ski-Doo and it was there that the calamity finally happened. As he raised a leg to hoist himself onto his place behind the guide, he felt, and even thought he heard, a terrible rending pain in his groin, a cracking and a parting, like a birth, like a glacier calving. He gave a shout . . ."